Journal excerpt, 2014:
'Cause me to know the way I should walk, for I lift up my soul to You.'
I am thankful that You have transformed me since I made the realization of my sinful attitude towards an uncertain future and then the decision to live out a better definition of trust. I've truly felt Your peace. Whereas this verse previously wrung my heart in an anguish of yearning, pleading with You for guidance, I read it now as a confident and peaceful declaraton of trust. I don't 'lift my soul' in desperate pleading. I lift it. Simply, as an offering; in trust that it is Yours to bless, that You will bless. I still crave Your guidance. But I have the peace of knowing that however this guidance is manifested, what it leads to, it will be good. I know You will bless. I know You will be with me. I am convinced, not just in mind but in heart of Your goodness as manifested in Your plan for my life.
You are good. So good that I am constantly discovering new depths and shades of Your goodness that I never knew before.
2016 has been an eventful, if not downright tumultous year, for the world as well as for myself.
Now that the year is starting to draw to a close, I see quips online complaining about the bleakness of the future and of the past year. Since my finals and graduation-minus-the-ceremony are approaching soon next year,
(read: having to face the big what are you going to do after you graduate question, and be able to justify my answer to myself as well as to others by actions and not just words) I'm afraid I'm also tempted to join the bandwagons of prophets foretelling doom and destruction.
So it was very timely that I happened to grab my journal the wrong way, and the first page flapped open revealing the very first entry; far back from 2014, at a time when university was the huge and terrifying question mark looming ahead of me.
There is a new one now--when isn't there?--but this reminds me that it will be another opportunity to learn to lift up my soul in trust.
a quiet voice
Ci thinks some of God's greatest blessings to mankind are
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